Let’s Not Wait for Flowers to Bloom in Graveyards

Zia Darakshan 

It’s been a while since I visited my grandmother. It was not a usual encounter, but a mix of emotional outbursts followed by her quiet yet warm embrace that soothed my turbulent mind, which had been restless for days together. Although I felt comforted, I could not find her the same. Yes, she has not been the same; with every passing day, she’s changing, leaving behind the traces of her past life when she was full of energy, charm, and sanity. It does hurt knowing that your dear one is close to the end, and you are so helpless. You want to hold her and not let the harsh reality of life even touch her. But that’s the real truth , this too shall pass. One day, we all have to accept this reality.

On this mother’s day I could not think of anything better than sharing this heavy yet thoughtful moment of my life . Honestly, I do not believe in capping  such emotions to a single day. Mothers are the purest souls in this world, holding the highest place in every religion and every human existence. They deserve to be celebrated not once a year, but every single day.

Blessed are those whose mothers are still with them, and they should cherish them while they can, because no relationship in this world can ever replace a mother’s place. I have lost my mother, but in my grandmother, I see the reflection of her. What I mean is that a mother, in whatever form she exists, always brings peace to our existence and solace to our souls.

Her  shadow is so strong that even the sweltering heat  feels gentle beneath it. Her presence is so vehement that it automatically cleanses our entire nervous system . A mother is the only person who can give away a piece of her own being for her child when the time comes.

But when she reaches old age, we often fail to fathom what she herself is going through. We have always seen her stoic and resilient, never truly imagining the depth of the inner battles she has fought like a warrior.

Many among us are pet lovers. We shower our pets with affection, spend time with them, care for their emotions, and seek comfort in their presence because they bring us peace and warmth in the chaos of life. Despite their demands we continue to love them wholeheartedly.

If we can offer such tenderness and patience to animals who simply make us feel emotionally comforted, then how beautiful would it be if we extended the same warmth, presence, and care to our old and fragile loved ones ? The very people who once held our trembling hands, comforted our fears, and carried us through the most vulnerable phases of our lives.

The irony is that the  heavy burden of life consumes us so deeply in daily chores and responsibilities that we fail to find time for the people who matter most.

However, when they pass away, we arrange grand obituaries, elaborate rituals, and countless formalities. We invite priests to pray for their souls and eternal peace in heaven. And this cycle continues until one day we arrive at the very same place ourselves, waiting for our own obituary to be written. Then comes the darkness , the end. Someone places flowers upon our resting place, and life quietly moves on without us.